Wade's Woman Page 13

CHAPTER TEN

  Ryan turned his back on Tara making unnecessary adjustments to the files on his desk. He couldn't quite believe he had said those harsh words and yet he was so angry, nothing could have stopped him. No, he wasn't angry, he was mortally wounded. Tara might just as well have thrust a knife into his heart the way he felt. He believed Michelle explicitly. She had no reason to lie. What she had told him about Tara and this man had torn him apart.

  Of course, he'd been through it all before with Carol, but nothing had prepared him for the searing pain of Tara's betrayal. He had learned to trust her, to look forward to every moment when he could be with her, touch her. He had fallen in love, damn it, and he would never forgive her for her deceit.

  "Ryan, please let me explain. It isn't how it seemed.” Tara moved forward, her eyes filling with tears as she pleaded with him.

  "Don't make things worse by making excuses, Tara. I thought we had something special growing between us—and I don't mean sex. I mean a special bond that would give our marriage a chance no matter what the outcome of the case. You've just blown it.” Ryan could feel his throat constricting as he said the harsh words, the look of agony on Tara's face all but destroying him.

  "You owe it to me to listen to what I have to say,” Tara gasped, gripping his arm.

  "I don't owe you anything!” Ryan snapped as once again he thought of some man having sex with his wife; caressing and loving her and Tara responding. A red haze of jealousy clouded his vision and he felt out of control as he flung her hand away from him.

  Tara was determined not to give up so easily. “Whoever told you this man and I were together misread what they saw."

  "Really?” Ryan was now frighteningly cool as he watched Tara's pleading eyes and trembling mouth. “Do you mean that he didn't caress your face?"

  "Well, yes but..."

  "And he didn't kiss you on your mouth?"

  "Yes! But not like you think."

  "Oh, spare me, Tara! I don't want to hear your lame excuses. If you can't keep your hands off each other in a public place, then how can you expect me to believe there is nothing going on?"

  Tara stepped back, her heart sinking. In the mood Ryan was in he wasn't going to give her a chance to explain. It was impossible! He was angry and bitter but if only he would listen to what she had to say, she would tell him everything.

  "So, you won't allow me to explain? You have such little trust in me that you have made your decision about our future?” Now it was Tara's turn to be cool although her voice still trembled.

  Ryan shrugged, dismissing her questions.

  "Very well, if that's what you think, I'll move into the end bedroom. I'm sure you can't bear to touch me and that's fine with me. I'll go and see to the children.” She spun away, rushing from the room and missed seeing the pain in Ryan's face.

  He sank into the chair and leaning his head in his hands, felt tears choking his throat. “Oh, Tara, how could you do this to us,” he whispered.

  * * * *

  They spent an uncomfortable evening, although both of the children claimed much of their attention.

  Tara returned to the kitchen and took over from Molly, serving dinner for Emma and Ben.

  When Ryan appeared he'd looked pale but, without a word, began feeding Ben, allowing Tara to serve dinner. They ate in silence, but Emma was so busy chattering to Ryan about her day at school, that their silence went almost unnoticed. When the children were in bed, Ryan disappeared into his study leaving Tara alone with her heartache.

  She fought back the tears as she stared unseeingly at a program on television, wondering whether she should try and speak to Ryan again. But she knew deep down that it was hopeless. He had been cheated and lied to by his former wife and now his lack of trust had placed her in the same position as Carol. He believed that Tara was cheating on him and it would appear that there were no second chances for her. He wanted to end their marriage, and soon.

  Tara went to bed in the spare bedroom and curled into a miserable ball under the duvet. How she missed Ryan's arms around her, loving and caring for her. She had hoped that he would forgive her and come to her, but the hours went by and there was no sound from Ryan's room. The happenings of the day kept churning around in Tara's mind. She realised that Ryan's attitude had made her even more determined to carry through her plan to give her inheritance to Tony. She wondered what she would do when she left here, but decided that right now she was so unhappy that she didn't care. Near dawn Tara drifted into an uncomfortable sleep, only to be shaken awake by a noisy Emma telling her that Ben needed his nappy changing.

  Over breakfast Ryan was polite to her and acted naturally with his children, teasing Emma and patiently mopping up a beaker of milk that Ben had spilt.

  Now they had to work together for most of the day and Tara wondered how she would survive being close to this man she loved and knowing how much he hated her.

  This morning was the normal time put aside for the day surgery outpatient session. Tara began automatically preparing the area, making sure that all of Ryan's instruments and dressings were in place

  "What have we got today?” he asked, looking over the notes on the desk.

  "A stye infection, and then you need to check the stitches from the cut to Mrs. Raynor's leg,” Tara replied in the same cool and professional tone that Ryan had used.

  "Lauren tells me there's a sunburn case coming in from one of the resorts."

  "Yes."

  Ryan glanced at Tara's face. She looked so miserable that he had to physically stop himself from reaching for her and drawing her into his arms. God! What a mess! Could he forgive her? She had never told him that she loved him all of the time they'd been together. When he had held her and kissed her and made love to her, she had never once said she loved him. I only need to lose my kids to Carol and my useless life will be complete. Everything I love will be gone.

  The first patient was a young man, Richard Green, who owned the local garage. His left eye looked very painful and was swollen with pus from a stye at the root of an eyelash.

  "Hmm. I think we'll need some antibiotics for that,” Ryan remarked as he scrubbed his hands in the basin. “Lie on the operating table, Richard, and I'll get rid of the pus that's built up."

  Tara placed a surgical gown around Ryan, her hands shaking slightly as her fingers inadvertently touched the nape of his neck as she tied the tapes. Ryan didn't seem to notice her hesitation as he pulled on his gloves.

  "This won't take a moment, Richard. I'm going to remove the eyelash and release the muck that's collected, then place an antibiotic directly on the stye and surrounding skin.” As he spoke Ryan set to work and quickly performed the minor procedure while Tara assisted him.

  "Gee, thanks, Ryan. That feels better already.” Richard sat up and went to place his finger to the sore spot. Tara quickly caught his hand.

  "Richard, you can easily re-infect yourself. You must avoid touching your eyes and keep your hands clean. Don't share or re-use any personal items such as facecloths or towels."

  Grinning at her, Richard gave a mock salute. “Yes, Ma'am! Hey, who needs you, Ryan, with your gorgeous nurse around,” he said, jumping down from the table.

  Ryan gave a grim nod. “Even so, I'm writing you a script for an oral antibiotic. Make sure you finish the course."

  Tara lowered her lashes and felt the colour rise in her face at the hard look she'd received from Ryan.

  Script in hand, Richard happily departed. Tara had only just finished tidying up when Lauren showed in the next patient. She was Debra James, an attractive young woman in her early twenties with an obviously quirky sense of humour as she plonked herself in the chair opposite Ryan. “I suppose you can see what the problem is, Doctor. I'm on holiday at one of the resorts and the sun was so warm that I thought I would get a tan."

  Ryan lifted the girl's chin and studied her face, which was very red and inflamed. “Yes, an unfortunate case of sunburn."

  "My face is only part of i
t,” she said and standing up, pulled off her ski jacket to reveal a very brief top. “I've burnt my back and my breasts. I'd no idea the sun could do this in winter.” She pulled down her top revealing more sore, red skin. As Tara watched, she realised that Debra had moved close to Ryan and was openly flirting with him, treating him to coquettish smiles.

  "You're lucky. You have very fair skin but these aren't severe burns and haven't blistered. However, I'm sure they're very uncomfortable.” Ryan moved away. “I have another patient to see, but my nurse will advise you on the treatment,” he said, turning towards Tara. “She'll also provide you with a spray that contains a topical anaesthetic, which will help."

  To Tara's astonishment Ryan left the two women together. Debra was clearly disappointed. “Wow! What a yummy dish!” she declared. “Do you think I frightened him off showing my boobs?"

  Tara suppressed a smile. How she could see humour in anything at the moment? “I think Doctor Wade is a little busy at present,” she said in her most professional manner. “Now, I have a leaflet here which will help you with your sunburn care, but basically don't go in the sun, drink plenty of fluids and take lots of cool baths. Compresses should help to ease the pain and here's the spray Doctor Wade referred to."

  Debra giggled as she struggled into her jacket. “Thanks. You're nice. And tell that handsome doctor not to worry. Any fool can see that he only has eyes for you!"

  * * * *

  Looking back, Tara wasn't sure how she got through the day. Ryan and she had seen another four patients, all requiring minor surgical procedures, and Ryan had remained polite but cold towards her. Gone was the exchange of glances full of caring and teasing fun that they had shared previously. Within a day he had become a stranger. He had closed her out of his life.

  His anger surely meant that he cared for her; or could it be that his pride had been hurt to think she had a lover. She wondered who it was that had seen Tony kissing her. Ryan had said it had been a reliable source, but she knew without asking that he would never tell her.

  At lunchtime she looked anxiously at Lauren who was sorting through the mail. How long would the documents take to get here? The lawyer had promised to send them urgently.

  "Is there anything the matter?” Lauren looked up enquiringly as Tara hovered around the reception desk.

  "Uh ... I'm expecting a letter. Would you make sure I get it as soon as it's delivered please?"

  Lauren smiled. “No problem but there's nothing for you today. Are you looking forward to tomorrow night?"

  Tara looked at her blankly. “What?"

  "It's Sir Ralph's cocktail party and dance, silly. Don't say you've forgotten about it. Everyone's going to be there."

  How could she have forgotten? The girls at reception had talked of nothing else for the past couple of weeks. It was the social event of the year, when most of Glenroy Crossing's adult population congregated at the mansion of the local squire and his wife, Sir Ralph and Lady Monica Carstairs. It was a joint celebration of the ski season and an excuse for the locals to mix and mingle, creating a feeling of comradeship in the midst of the High Country's rugged winter. Lauren had told Tara about it when she'd first arrived, but with the activities of the past few days she hadn't given it another thought.

  "I'm sorry, but I won't be able to go,” she said, her tone apologetic. “I'll need to baby-sit. I expect Ryan will be going."

  Lauren leaned across the desk. “Tara, are you nuts? Of course you're going. Ryan has arranged for Molly's eldest daughter to baby-sit. She'll be fine with the kids."

  "But, but...” Tara was stuck for words. How could she go to this event with Ryan treating her with such disdain?

  "Ryan's on call,” Lauren continued, happily chatting away. “But hopefully it will be a quiet night."

  Tara ploughed through the afternoon, taking regular blood tests from her personal patients, checking and re-doing dressings, and instructing two of Ryan's pregnant patients on the importance of a correct diet and good intake of folic acid. One of the patients was finding it very difficult to give up smoking and Tara spent some time with the anxious woman, advising and encouraging her.

  At home that evening everything appeared normal as Ryan bathed Ben before his bedtime while Emma played with her Barbie dolls in the lounge. Tara stood at the bathroom door watching him slosh water over Ben's sturdy back as the little boy shrieked with delight

  Tara cleared her throat. The sight of this man whom she loved so much tenderly caring for his son did strange things to her heart. How she would miss him and the children when she had to go. Ryan was tough and unforgiving. He had forgiven Carol for her affair and then she had run away, betraying his trust yet again. Now he believed that Tara had also betrayed him and there seemed no way to reach him. He didn't want to know.

  "Ryan, about this party tomorrow night. It seems pointless for me to go. I'll stay home with the kids.” Her voice sounded odd and high pitched, while her knuckles showed white where she gripped the door handle.

  Standing up, Ryan slowly turned, wiping at the splash marks on his shirt with a towel. “You're coming with me."

  "Why? You don't want me there."

  "No. I don't. But people will gossip, as you've already found out. I'm not going to allow anyone the opportunity of saying we are anything but a loving couple."

  Tara stiffened at his attitude. “And what if I say I won't go?"

  Ryan lifted the wiggling, wet Ben from the bath and wrapping him in a huge towel, held him close against his shoulder.

  "We're nearly there, Tara. Next week I will know whether I can keep my kids and you can be released from this farce of a marriage to go to your lover. We need to present a united front at the party. I'm asking you, not for my sake, but for the sake of Emma and Ben, to cooperate for a few more days."

  He didn't plead but was clever enough to tap into Tara's vulnerability as she gazed at Ben, pink and rosy from his bath, nuzzling into his father's neck. Yes, he knew she would put his children before anything. She loved them almost as much as he. Without thinking, she reached for Ben, kissing his soft, little face.

  "Emma wants you to read her a chapter from Harry Potter,” she said, blinking away the tears that welled in the eyes. “I'll see to Ben. And yes, I'll come with you tomorrow.” She turned away before she broke down in tears again, carrying Ben to the nursery.

  * * * *

  The next morning Tara hung around the surgery finding things to do in her office as she waited with trepidation for the mail to arrive. She was due to leave shortly to visit Thelma West at the end of the main street and was also scheduled to make several other home visits.

  Peering out of the window, she frowned at the miserable weather. Although it wasn't snowing, it was bleak, with a bitterly cold wind blowing. She had heard nothing from Tony, thank heavens, although she had nervously checked and re-checked the house for any evidence that he had been there.

  "Is this what you're waiting for?” Lauren dropped a large, official-looking envelope on to Tara's desk.

  "Oh, thanks Lauren.” Tara tried to appear casual as her heart pounded in her chest. She waited for Lauren to leave, ignoring her curious glance, and then tore open the package. It was all there, everything the lawyer and she had discussed. On the top was the all important letter which, when signed, meant she had given away her inheritance. There were two copies of everything and now she had to contact Tony and arrange a witness to their signatures.

  "You'd better get going on your rounds or you'll be late everywhere,” Lauren called from the doorway as Tara hastily stuck the papers into her bag. Hells Bells! How was she going to manage this without arousing suspicion? She needed to contact a policeman or another lawyer or even a Justice of the Peace.

  She quickly pulled on her coat and gloves and gathered up her bag containing the precious documents, plus her medical kit. She felt like a criminal as she took her list of patients from Jane, one of the receptionists. Glancing over the long list she realised she would n
ever have the time to arrange to meet Tony today. She would have to ring him and let him know.

  Thirty minutes later Tara felt a little better. From the privacy of her vehicle she had managed to contact a Justice of the Peace who lived on the outskirts of the town. He had agreed to witness the papers and assured Tara that all information would be in confidence.

  She had then rung Tony's mobile, her stomach giving a nauseous heave at the sound of his voice.

  "That's good, Tara,” he said softly as he wrote down the address of the justice of the peace. “I was beginning to think that you were spinning me a yarn and you know that I wouldn't like that, don't you?” Once again the veiled threat hung in the air and she quickly rang off. Now she would need to think up some excuse to get away from work at four o'clock tomorrow.

  * * * *

  Ryan straightened his tie as he checked it in the bedroom mirror. He hated wearing suits, but everyone dressed up for this one special night of the year. He wondered what Tara would wear. He hadn't seen her since this morning at breakfast when she had been subdued, but he'd watched her face light up as she'd listened to one of Emma's long, convoluted stories. He knew he was being a bastard to make her come with him to Ralph and Monica's party, but, damn it, if it meant the slightest difference to him keeping the kids, he didn't care. Carol's friends would be there tonight, watching and waiting to report every glance, every word, and he wasn't taking any chances.

  Putting on his suit jacket, he ran a hand across his jaw, staring at his reflection. He looked how he felt, angry and bitter. For the umpteenth time he asked himself why Tara had betrayed him and so openly, in a public place. He desperately wanted to know who the man was that she had met and to whom she had shown such romantic affection. Affection that he thought she was only giving to him. Surely she had shown it in so many ways, particularly since their time at the resort when she had been so loving and caring, so sensual.

  He frowned into the mirror. He didn't know whether he loved or hated her; all he knew was that he couldn't bear to hear any more lies from her lips. He shrugged. It had been great while it lasted, but soon it would be over.